'Fathers who take no responsibility for children born after one night stands should be tracked down by DNA and made to pay up'

Martin Shipton

Sara Whithorn was born in Wales 50 years ago, nine months after her parents had a one night stand.

After many years wondering about her origins, she has finally identified her biological father and earlier this year obtained a High Court declaration confirming his identity.

But her quest has raised major concerns about men who evade all aspects of paternal responsibility for children they have fathered.

Ms Whithorn has shared her moving story with Nation.Cymru.

She told us: “I was born in 1975 and raised solely by my mother on social security in Pendre, Bridgend, with ‘father unknown’ recorded on my birth certificate. I am the result of a one night stand in Porthcawl in 1974.

“For almost five decades, I was denied not only emotional connection but also financial support, identity, and truth.

“In 2022, after finding a DNA match on Ancestry.com, I began a two-year legal process, entirely self-funded, which has now legally confirmed Michael Standen, a multimillionaire property developer from South Cornelly, near Bridgend, as my father. He has refused all contact, DNA testing, or acknowledgement - despite the court’s ruling and overwhelming biological evidence.

“This isn’t a story of revenge. It’s about accountability, healing, and legacy. Every time a child grows up with ‘father unknown’ on their birth certificate, the British taxpayer foots the bill. In my case, social security supported my mother and I throughout my entire childhood, while my biological father raised other children - some not biologically his - in comfort and abundance.

“I believe it’s time we asked:

Should DNA testing be mandated when one parent is unlisted?

What is the true cost of ‘father unknown’ on the welfare system?

And what rights does a child have to be acknowledged—not just biologically, but morally?”

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Birth certificate

Explaining why she was telling her story now, she said: “I’ve just received my new, updated birth certificate with Mr Michael John Standen’s name.

“After years of searching, heartbreak, legal proceedings, and silence, I feel it’s time for this story to be told—not to shame, but to shed light on what it means to be denied the truth of your own origins in a modern society.

“I am so passionate about every human having the right to know who they come from.

“My Mum was 20 at the time of the one night stand. She kept her pregnancy secret from everyone. No one knew she was pregnant until she was in active labour with me. Hence when I was born I didn't have so much as my own nappy.

“When she took me home to my grandparents’ house I had everything any child could want. I was surrounded with love. Life was great when we lived in Pendre.

“I always wondered who my father was. Mum married when I was three. It didn't last more than 18 months. Mum said he couldn't accept me. I have minimal memory of this time.

“When I was 10 we moved to another house in Pendre when she married a man who abused me from age 10 to 15.

“I left Bridgend at 18. I have and always will come home.

“During my 20s, I became focused on finding my father - for my daughters’ sake as much as my own. I put my mother through hell pressing her for information.

“My mother never spoke openly about my father. When I did summon the courage to ask, it was always in emotionally charged moments — usually when I was under the influence myself, desperate for answers. Her responses were inconsistent, vague, and sometimes painful. She told me his name was Gareth Hooper — a lie, as it turned out. I believe now it was a name my biological father gave her to disappear from accountability. She never knew him — it was a one-night stand.

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South east Asia

As he worked in south east Asia until 1990 she never bumped into him, or saw him again. I have a voice memo of my meeting with him where he tells me in the 1970s he was earning £100k per year, tax free.

“When Mum & I moved from Pendre, where we lived with my grandparents; Joan & Arthur Spurgeon, to 68 Pendre, we had nothing. I was the kid with a dinner ticket. Mum couldn't afford for me to go on any more school trips. We had nothing. I started working when I was 12, and would save up my earnings to buy my brothers Ryan and Scott branded clothes, because I didn't want them to feel as I had. Mum did the very best with what she had, and I was always her protector. My brothers too. I am 11 years older than Ryan, and 13 older than Scott.

“He also told me 1974 was the year he'd had enough of working overseas and claims to have driven home to Wales from Singapore.

“In my 20's I wrote a letter to every single Gareth Hooper in the telephone book. When I drew a blank I then contacted South Wales Police to trace him, just like my grandmother did in 1975.

“There was never a Gareth Hooper, trainee police officer in 1974. It was a blatant lie. I was devastated.

“When Mum passed away last year I found my baptism certificate, where she has recorded my fathers name as "Gareth". This is the name Michael Standen gave her on their one night stand, in Porthcawl. She was telling me the truth. It was him that lied.

“In 2009, I emigrated to Australia. I built a life here — working in corporate management, beauty education, and now as a business development manager in the medical aesthetics industry. I’m married, have children of my own, and I always told myself I didn’t need to know where I came from. But the truth is, the ache never left. The older I got, the louder it became.

“The big push for me to leave the UK was after I eventually reported the sexual abuse from my my mothers previous husband, and the CPS decided not to pursue it.

“I was done. Lost all faith in the British justice system . This man is a convicted rapist with a long history of violence. He 1st sexually assaulted me when I was 10 years old. This continued until I was 15. At 18 I left Bridgend and moved to the north east of England after meeting my husband of 33 years in Spain when I was 27 and he was 20.

“I have spent many hours and money in therapy throughout my adulthood. Every birthday wish has been to find my father.

“In 2023, I took a DNA test through Ancestry.com. I matched with my first cousin, paternal side — Ian Gannicott. He was open, supportive, and brave enough to help piece the puzzle together. Through Ian’s help, I discovered my biological father is Michael John Standen — a multi-millionaire businessman who brought up several other non-biological children and grandchildren as his own.

“Michael’s son Jonathan Standen kindly provided his DNA which records him as my half brother. Philip Standen, Michaels half brother also provided his DNA, which is recorded as my half uncle.

“I reached out with kindness, vulnerability, and openness. I even sent Michael a Father’s Day gift — a book titled Everything About My Dad — in the hopes he might one day fill in the pages. But he has refused to acknowledge me.

“In March 2025, after initiating legal action, the High Court in London officially declared Michael Standen as my biological father. The declaration of parentage now legally entitles me to have my birth certificate amended — a monumental moment of truth after 50 years.

“But legal truth doesn’t equate to emotional closure. He still denies me. And while I now hold a document proving who I am — the human connection I longed for remains missing.

“In actual fact having found him alive, well, and thriving, it cuts deeper knowing he won't acknowledge me, yet supports his wife's daughters from her previous marriage, and her nephew who they adopted when his mother died. Michael and Diane Standen didn't meet until the late 1980s

“I am now calling for change. Children born with “Father Unknown” on their birth certificate are statistically more likely to grow up in poverty, rely on state assistance, and experience identity-related trauma. The taxpayer foots the bill — while many fathers, like mine, walk away without consequence.

I believe we need:

Mandatory DNA collection when a birth is registered without both parents listed.

Financial reparations where paternity is later proven and historic child support was never paid.

Education and reform in social services to support adult children seeking truth through DNA.

“My mother passed away in my arms in 2024 after a long battle with illness. I had travelled back to Bridgend and spent her final months by her side. It was one of the most important promises I ever kept.

“I returned to Australia heartbroken — and within weeks, lost my job and then my 15-year-old dog, who also died in my arms. This journey has been filled with grief, but also resilience.

“My Nan, Cllr Joan Hilda Scott Spurgeon, was an amazing woman. A Bridgend town and county councillor.

“My brother Scott Baldwin, a former Wales rugby international, still lives in the UK and helped collect my father’s DNA after my declaration of parentage had been issued. He knew how important this has been to me, and wanted me to finally have the full stop I have always needed, not another question mark. .Sadly, Michael did everything he wasn't supposed to and no DNA could be extracted

“I now live in Northern Rivers, New South Wales, Australia.

“This isn’t about money for me. It never was. I just wanted to be acknowledged — to not feel erased. But now, I realise my story can serve a purpose far bigger than me. If one child gets a faster answer, if one mother is spared a lifetime of secrecy, if one policy changes — it will have been worth it.

“Finally myself, daughters, and grandchildren know their lineage.”